A realisation

Hi, I’m back from Bangkok.

Thrilled? Not really. Hopeful? Yes, definitely.

As much as I love Bangkok city and wouldn’t mind taking a 2 hour flight on weekends to paint the town red with my boyfriend, I really hope he gets to come back to KL soon and finally put the work-permit-mumbo-jumbo to rest. The anxiety of an uncertainty that befell upon him on this career path is not amusing.

But I am pretty sure everything will turn out just fine, as how it’s supposed to be. I’ve no idea how can I get so calm and so optimistic. But I guess after 3 decades I’ve finally learn how to adapt to situations of uncertainties.

Long gone is that girl who grinds her teeth and fought with all her might for something that she thinks is right and believes with all her heart. How foolish she must have been, to see the world through a pigeon hole and disregard the entire universe that has make up certain reaction and outcome. To have been so selfish to her own projection of what is right and what is wrong, without considering the people around her.

I’ve gotten it all wrong. My so called passion has led me to become self-centred. Who am I to dismissed other people’s thoughts and ideas? I am but a tiny┬ácontribution┬áto an intertwined series of events. After all, corporations are still making their millions and consumers are still throwing in their dollars.

With that┬árealisation, its only fair to be channeling my passion and energy to things that is truly mine for self fulfilment. Like…my writing, my mexican cooking, my Spanish class and my relationship with my boyfriend.

This realisation feels good.

Everything is all good.

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